OMG!

Het perfecte parkeerplekje bij mijn oude vertrouwde supermarkt is nog vrij. pablo-362

Die is van mij! Ik parkeer en check (maar) een stuk of tien keer de handrem. Dit wordt dus een nieuw dwangneurotisch dingetje. De handrem zit erop Ella, kappen nou. Ik kijk achterom. Nee, de auto staat echt stil.

Voor het eerst sinds mijn verkeerde-karretje’s-disaster durf ik me hier weer te vertonen. Een beetje schichtig nog, loop ik door de gangen. Een ontmoeting met de bedrijfsleider kan ik echt nog niet aan.

Aangekomen bij de kassa, blijkt mijn karretje wat voller dan gepland (geen lijstje). Ik probeer alles zo snel mogelijk op de band te zetten. Niets zo vervelend als slome mensen, waardoor iedereen nog langer moet wachten. Tegelijkertijd pak ik een fles diksap, een pak melk en twee flessen limonade. Een disaster waiting to happen…

De fles diksap glijdt uit mijn handen en spat op de vloer uit elkaar. Het stroperige sap verspreidt zich snel. Fuckerdefuck. Cassière (gelukkig een andere dan vorige keer) belt een medewerker, die de troep snel opruimt. Goed, disaster uit de weg geruimd. Niets aan de hand. Alles goed.

‘Dat is dan €87,40. Wilt u pinnen mevrouw?’ Ik knik bevestigend terwijl ik door mijn portemonnee ga. Waar de f is mijn pinpas? In een flits zie ik de pas voor me liggen op het aanrecht. Waar ik hem neergelegd had, zodat ik m niet zou vergeten…Ik wil net het hele  verhaal aan cassière uit de doeken te doen, als ik op mijn schouder wordt getikt.  ‘Hulp nodig?’ Ik kijk om

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Auteur: Renske Kaldewaij

Ella Ebeling is de creatie van schrijver en journalist Renske Kaldewaij. Net als Ella is Renske 38 jaar oud, ruim zeven jaar verloofd en moeder van drie kinderen. De verhalen zijn deels autobiografisch, deels verzonnen.

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