Van je ouders moet je het maar hebben…

‘Nederland 1. Nu!’ pablo-185

Met mobiel tegen mijn oor ren ik naar de televisie. Ik struikel over een paar autootjes, een playmobielpaardje kan ik nog net ontwijken. Ik pak het op en land op de bank. This better be good!

Talkshowhost M. verschijnt. Not my most favorite person in the history (of EVER). Ze praat suf, ze kijkt suf, ze ís suf. Ik kan haar niet zien, laat staan horen. ‘Mam, wat…waarom?’, hijg ik.

M.’s (echt ontiegelijk irritante) stem schalt door de kamer. ‘…en de buren herkenden dat konijn. Dus ik doe een briefje in de bus –die bewoners waren er niet- en neem dat konijntje mee naar huis. Nog een keer de foto?’

Het playmobielpaard valt uit mijn handen. Coke! Ik ren naar de voordeur en graai tussen de stapel papier op de vloer. Een beetje verfromfraaid, maar nog goed leesbaar ligt daar inderdaad een briefje… van de meest irritante talkshowhost ever. 21.30. Konijn gevonden. Buren zeggen van jullie. Mee naar huis genomen. Bel …. M.

Half tien… toen lag ik natuurlijk alweer te tukken.

Ergens vanonder de enorme stapel papier hoor ik het proestende gelach van mama. Ik vis mijn mobiel tussen de post vandaan en kijk er boos naar. En ja hoor, daar klinkt ik ook de bulderende lach van papa al. Het huilen staat me nader dan het lachen. ‘Heel grappig hoor. Fijn dat jullie dochter voor de duizendste keer voor schut staat hè?! HA HA HA.’

Het proesten en bulderen gaat gewoon door. Woedend druk ik ze weg.

Waarom is uitgerekend ONS weggelopen konijn bij een talkshowhost terecht gekomen?! AAAARGH!

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Auteur: Renske Kaldewaij

Ella Ebeling is de creatie van schrijver en journalist Renske Kaldewaij. Net als Ella is Renske 38 jaar oud, ruim zeven jaar verloofd en moeder van drie kinderen. De verhalen zijn deels autobiografisch, deels verzonnen.

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